I Love A Good Chat But...
" You don't like it when people talk too much."
These were the words my sister once said to me a while back. I am not sure what the context of our conversation was, that led to her saying this to me, but all I remember was denying every bit of it.
Okay... I just remembered what my sister and I were talking about. We were talking about my little nephew and how he's almost getting to the stage where he is going to be able to have proper conversations with adults and other kids too.
My nephew is the cutest thing I have ever laid eyes on (I say this to every cute baby I see... guilty). But he really is cute and I never knew I could love a human being the way I do till I met him. He's also very stubborn and naughty. He gives my sister a hard time occasionally but at the end of the day he is cute so he can get away with it right? Correct. We ALL forgive him and forget about what a little terror he can be sometimes when he is peacefully watching cartoons or when he crawls up to you for a cuddle or kiss. Love always wins with that kid.
So anyways we spoke about how he will soon be talking, and I got really excited because that means I will be able to have full blown conversations with him. My sister stopped me in my tracks before I could even get carried away with this idea.
She told me that I am going to have the worst time adjusting to my nephew when he starts talking. She said something along the lines of, "you don't like people who talk too much and when this kid starts talking you won't be able to handle it."
This caught me off guard because first things first I LOVE my nephew so why on earth would I NOT enjoy him talking, even if it meant that he would be such a chatter box?
I tried to argue her claim but the more she gave examples of how much I hate it when people just won't stop talking, I ran out of responses and excuses to give. At this point I felt completely awful because it is true I LOATHE it when people talk too much.
Don't get me wrong, I love a good conversation and enjoy learning different things from people who have something to share. I am not one of those people who avoid humans at all costs. I am quite social and sometimes I am the one who seeks out conversations but the truth is I admire silence more. I fantasize about being alone and enjoying my own company. (No I am not weird or a loner, it's just a preference).
The truth is sometimes, I get so exhausted trying to keep up with people who talk so much.
Does this mean I am going to be a bad Aunty?
Does this mean I am going to have to painfully sit and listen to my nephew, as he details every single event that happened to him at school while deep down, wishing he would just keep quiet?
Does this make me a bad person in general for feeling this way?
Everything I just said makes me sound and feel like an ass. But it's the truth. It's the truth and right now I do not have a solution for it but I have identified that I may have a problem in that area that may or may not need to be addressed. I may not know if its entirely a bad thing yet but I do know that when it comes to the people I love, I always make an effort to listen and make myself available when they need me most.
For the most part, I enjoy listening but when I start to feel like I have been listening for too long, it does get draining and it sometimes leaves me so depleted I can't always accommodate the next person with the same tenacity as I had with the first person. In my defense though, my grandmother was an awfully quiet person. I never got the chance to figure out why but if she felt the same way I do, then it wasn't just a me thing.
If you sometimes struggle keeping up with people who talk too much, share your thoughts in the comments section. If you have solutions on how I can improve or where I am going wrong, I'd love to hear that too.